Reconciliation sex is a resource widely used in fiction. Both cinema and literature are regulars at his script. Now, what happens in reality? Is it good or bad?
Make-up sex is a very popular concept, common in books and movies. A couple argues, tempers flare and, surprisingly, everything ends in bed.
Some people even claim that this sex is better than “normal”. How is this possible? A priori , love and passion should not be compatible with shouting and insults.
In this article we review this question in depth, since you are not the first person to ask the question of the title. Here you will find what we really know today about this issue.
What is make-up sex?
What is commonly known as reconciliation sex is the one that occurs after a strong argument. It is very passionate sex and the people who have experienced it affirm that the intensity of the feelings of anger are mixed with those of the love relationship.
The intense nature of this practice is what makes many couples consider that the experience of sex is better after a conflict. It is more common to see make-up sex in more unstable relationships.
Another reason why couples look favorably on having sex in the middle of an argument is because of the value of the sexual encounter itself to change the prevailing feelings , especially if they have been generated by a minor conflict. This creates a sense of closure and that a problem that deep down was not worth discussing has been fixed.
Is make-up sex beneficial?
The real question is: is sex really a good way to end an argument? Well, let’s try to answer.
It is often used to ask for forgiveness
Sex serves as a rapprochement tool for some couples, since after an argument an emotional gap is created between both members. Many times, pride is a stone on the road to reconciliation and sex can help with this.
The negative connotation of this practice is that, as feelings of love and reconciliation emerge, the official apology is often ignored. This can create rough edges later for some people.
Make-up sex can make things worse
Sex doesn’t always go well. Although it’s no one’s fault and it’s enough to stop and continue at another time, if you start a sexual act after a fight and it doesn’t turn out to be satisfactory, it is likely to make the situation even worse.
It could become a problem in itself
If having sex during arguments becomes a habit, it is possible that the intensity of the feelings that are aroused end up normalizing it as a way of solving problems. Some couples end up arguing to maintain relationships or only having sex when they argue.
In most cases, this ends up in parked issues that are not fixed and become chronic. Couples can also fall into unhealthy dynamics, such as using sex to mask negative feelings.
It does not serve to forget
While it is true that passion, as opposed to previous discomfort, can make you forget the conflict momentarily, it will not magically disappear.
Even if things have calmed down, going back to conflict again is unpleasant for many people. This usually causes the entrenchment of problems in relationships.
The possibilities of make-up sex
Despite the dangers that make-up sex may entail, it can be a valid tool in resolving interpersonal conflicts.
The problem comes when the sexual act replaces dialogue and the search for solutions. However, the release of tension and the call to intimacy associated with the sexual encounter can facilitate the resolution of the conflict .
Reconciliation sex helps to temper the spirits and clears the mind to have a calm conversation and that starts from positive feelings.
On the other hand, on many occasions, couples have discussions about issues without significance. For example, something that one of them did in the past, which has no further experience and which they have already recognized as a mistake.
As in other matters of couples and sex: a practice will be good or not depending on the variables of the context. Also, what works for some does not work for others. Each couple must find the best way to solve their problems, with or without sex.
