They are the fire that ignites the passion and the fuel for perfect sex: they are called sexual fantasies and are exciting thoughts that give a boost to the eroticism of the couple (and not only: they make masturbation unique above all). They can be conscious desires – we know what excites us and why – or unconscious – we feel a drive, but we do not yet know how to identify it, but in any case they are the fruit of our imagination and are the demonstration that we enjoy (in every sense) a perfect mental health.
Yes, because many of what were once considered sexual perversions are now cleared and recognized as simple and very healthy erotic dreams, something that we no longer have to hide, but that we must live with absolute normality regardless of our sexual tastes .
According to psychologists, in most cases erotic thoughts come to life from an unconscious desire that we have repressed, they are felt especially during adolescence – from the first experiences of autoeroticism onwards, even if there are those who develop the first sexual fantasies. already at the age of 6 – and they are a real safety valve that helps us not only to escape from everyday boredom, but also from the moral and social pressures linked to sex.
Erotic fantasies are our natural aphrodisiac: they help to say adieu to banality and push us to experiment with ever new sensations (positions, experiences and emotions). There is no time for boredom if there is fantasy in sex ! And the statistics prove it: 90% of men and 80% of women indulge in fantasies in bed .
Sexual fantasies: the differences between men and women
Female and male fantasies have some basic differences, as experts explain: male eroticism is stimulated by thoughts related to sexual performance – such as games related to oral sex, the desire for anal sex, imagining specific positions. . There is no shortage of the most intense sex dreams such as couple swapping, sadomasochism or acts of voyeurism (yes, we are talking about those who love to sneak up on or be watched while undressing and going wild in hot moments). Among the exciting things that drive a man out of his mind, usually, there are also fantasies related to female shoes , the idea of being submissive at women’s feet., imagining sex between women and golden rain – or the desire to pee or pee.
But what are women’s sexual fantasies ? In addition to those in common with male partners, there are more particular situations such as sex with objects and in less classic places such as in the elevator, in the tub, in the dressing room of a store, in front of the fireplace or a sunset on the beach … Some female erotic desires they are much stronger and linked to sexual submission : for example being taken by force or against one’s will. The idea of eroticism between women is not just a male classic: it is also a very widespread female fantasy.
Sexual fantasies: the most popular with couples
All couples, even the hottest ones, need a little fantasy in sex, aka: a little spice to keep the passion alive without getting used to it. What are the most popular couple fantasies ? According to a survey conducted by the Huffington Post USA and confirmed by the testimony of sex therapists, experts and psychologists, the most common are:
- The ménage à trois , aka threesome relationship: a real sensual overload for both men and women, is different from swinging. In this case, a third person comes into play – man or woman – who changes the balance of sex. It doesn’t matter if it comes true: just imagine it to give a twist to intimacy.
- Domination and submission : Power and the feeling of control collide with the desire for submission. One partner leads and decides, the other fulfills his demands – 50 shades of gray , anyone?
- Imagine the partner having sex with another : challenging the forbidden and going beyond the box. It is not a question of ménage à trois because in this case it is just observed and the reason is very clear according to the psychologists: watching another who touches the partner’s body makes us want our loved one even more and brings us back to the first days in which we have desired.
The 10 sexual fantasies for couples to make love with passion
There is much, much more beyond the three most common fantasies, especially if we investigate women’s sexual desires . These are the 10 couple sexual fantasies for unforgettable sex:
- Completely smooth: The watchword is one: total hair removal! The completely shaved genitals excite and allow you to feel more intense sensations both during penetration and oral sex because the pleasure receptors are more within reach (and tongue).
- Female erotic games (and not only): the best idea to spice up the (usual) couple sex is to use some object. A remote controlled vibrator, handcuffs, clitoral massagers… the limit is your imagination!
- Mirror, mirror of my desires: doing it in front of the mirror is the definitive solution to awaken the libido, according to experts.
- Fresh and free: she should forget her underwear at home and amaze him by letting him discover it in unusual moments (at the restaurant, at the cinema…).
- A little bondage : zero complications! A scarf – perhaps silk – is enough for games based on control and desire.
- Look at the camera: point a camera to shoot during sex and the pleasure will skyrocket. It doesn’t matter if you watch the video again, but the idea of shooting it turns on all the circuits.
- Let’s play doctor: role play is the best way to let sexual fantasies come to life. Patient and doctor, boss and secretary, guard and thief: going wild with the imagination helps to overcome moral limits and to ask for what we really want.
- The thrill of danger: doing it in the open air, in the car and in a situation at risk of possible sgamo takes off the libido. Sure, there is some danger, but maybe that’s the most exciting part of it …
- A hot background: Watching a hardcore movie together, letting it excite both of you and inspire some new practice is the pinnacle of couple’s sexual fantasies .
- Smooth as oil: a nice collection of stimulating, perfumed, silky lubricants is the must for a bit of rough sex , but also to give anal sex a try (another super fantasy of many).