Men and women seem to experience differences in their desire. Now why? In which direction do these differences go?

When we get into the subject of sexual desire, a number of stereotyped categories arise. But what characterizes sexual desire? What are the differences between male and female sexual desire?

Sexual desire is an impulse that directs us to seek contact and to interact sexually . There are various roots involved, for example, biological, psychological, social, cultural, relational, etc. So sexual desire is multifactorial. It can be triggered by the following types of stimulation:

  • External stimulation. For example, that the couple has dressed in a particularly attractive way.
  • Internal stimulation. That is, factors associated with thought or biology.

When we talk about female and male sexual desire, we refer to the one associated with gender. And, gender, according to the pan-Hispanic dictionary of doubts, refers to ‘the socially constructed attributes, roles, activities, responsibilities and needs predominantly related to belonging to the female or male sex in certain societies and communities at a given time’.

Gender differences become visible in everyday life. But also, in the formation of sexual desire. In fact, the masculine usually contains fewer layers than the feminine.

Next, we show you what the differences consist of, at a general level; With them, we do not mean that in many cases they are greater than those that individual differences can produce.

Differences in male and female sexual desire according to age

If we talk about the masculine in relation to sexual desire in men  , we can say that it appears at puberty, sometimes associated with “nocturnal emissions”. It seems to last until the age of 50, to later begin its decline, accompanied in some by a drop in libido.

Female sexual desire in women can be awakened later. In addition, according to experience, the period of sexual maturity occurs around the age of 35 and can decrease or increase with the arrival of menopause.

In many cases, sexual desire as a state is closely associated with the general health of the person. In other words, we can improve our sexual desire by improving our general state of health, including, of course, mental health.

The Excitement

It is different in each genre. Research suggests that women tend to be more aroused by the context, while men by the content. For example, women would take emotional connection more into account. while men would not put as a “condition” that this connection occur at that moment. What’s more, for many of them, sexual desire and its satisfaction would be a way to create this connection and not a consequence of it.

However, men tend to have more preferences . One fact that may explain this is that they may think more about sex than women do and therefore, in some ways, may have clearer ideas about what they want and what they don’t.

Psychological factors

Psychological factors can be mediated by education, culture, society and even religion, influencing people’s thoughts. Classically, it has been thought that men are capable of dissociating sex from emotions . They would be able to experience sexual desire in more heterogeneous emotional states.

On the other hand, the fact that men are more aroused by content and women by context is supported by much of the research that we know of. However, Rupp and Wallen, in their article Sex differences in Response to a visual sexual stimuli: a review , suggest that there may be confusion in the conclusions of various studies, as there is an unconsidered interaction between the measured desire, the variable of stimuli presented and measurement techniques.

So, it is a topic that is still developing. We do not have a definitive answer. For now, it appears that sexual motivation, perceived gender role expectations, and sexual attitudes would explain why there is this differentiation in male and female sexual desire.

However, we cannot leave out exceptional cases, for example, women with high sexual desire. Research regarding sexual desire in women often emphasizes relationship and context. However, this can vary greatly from woman to woman.

Women with high sexual desire have a greater number of sexual impulses, participate in more sexual communication and have more frequent and elaborate thoughts and fantasies. In addition, coming to consider themselves sexual adventurers, and with a high libido.

It may happen that there is this difference between women due to social and cultural aspects that have restricted the expression of sexuality in women. In fact, women with high sexual desire tend to feel that society has a negative view of them, and they come to feel worried about what others might think about the characteristics of their desire.

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